WOW!! Came out to parents

I unexpectedly came out to my 78 year old parents tonight. I was over for dinner and told them about my name change to Sky. My mother said you will always be my little Sarah. And basically said she would not call me by Sky. I let it go for a while. after dinner was made and over I brought the whole name change up again which really was all I wanted to talk about. I tried better explaining that I have never felt comfortable with Sarah, that it has never felt like me. I needed a more gender neutral name. My mom asked ‘So, when will you get a sex change?”. I am sure she was halfway joking and halfway knowing, and I replied, “I don’t know another year or two. (pause) I have already started on testosterone.” The conversation went on from there with my mom saying “it is what it is” (my favorite saying), my dad not saying much but when he did say something it was essentially I love you no matter what and this is not a big deal. Shocking. When i came out as gay to my parents it was not easy. They were both angry and in denial, telling me that this is a phase and you will grow out of it. Obviously I never did. I expected something similar, loving and rejecting simultaneously.  I did not expect overwhelming openness and curiosity. I did explain I am exploring if doing the androgynous approach will be enough or if I need to go all the way male. Told them a little of how testosterone works and more of how I have coped all my life as a gender non conforming butch lesbian and that it is not enough. I told them about my tearful response to my sisters inquiry which opened me back up to all of this. They listened and asked questions and throughout I felt a total sense of unconditional love from them. So wow!! The name change convo turned into a coming out convo only because my mom asked when I was going to get my sex change. Choice point to lie or to answer honestly. I am glad I chose answering honestly. And I am super glad they were open and accepting. WOW!!!


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